THE ADULT LEARNING CENTER FOR MEN

REGISTRATION MUST BE COMPLETED
by Friday, September 28, 2007 

NOTE: DUE TO THE COMPLEXITY AND DIFFICULTY LEVEL OF THEIR CONTENTS, CLASS SIZES WILL BE LIMITED TO 8 PARTICIPANTS MAXIMUM 


Class 1
How To Fill Up The Ice Cube Trays--Step by Step, with Slide Presentation. 
Meets 4 weeks, Monday and Wednesday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. 

Class 2 
The Toilet Paper Roll--Does It Change Itself?
Round Table Discussion.
Meets 2 weeks, Saturday 12:00 for 2 hours. 

Class 3 
Is It Possible To Urinate Using The Technique Of Lifting The Seat and Avoiding The Floor, Walls and Nearby Bathtub?--Group Practice. 
Meets 4 weeks, Saturday 10:00 PM for 2 hours. 

Class 4 
Fundamental Differences Between The Laundry Hamper and The Floor--Pictures and Explanatory Graphics. 
Meets Saturdays at 2:00 PM for 3 weeks. 

Class 5 
Dinner Dishes--Can They Levitate and Fly Into The Kitchen Sink?
Examples on Video.
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning 
at 7:00 PM 

Class 6 
Loss Of Identity--Losing The Remote To Your Significant Other.
Help Line Support and Support Groups. 
Meets 4 Weeks, Friday and Sunday 7:00 PM 

Class 7 
Learning How To Find Things--Starting With Looking In The Right Places And Not Turning The House Upside Down While Screaming.
Open Forum 
Monday at 8:00 PM, 2 hours. 

Class 8 
Health Watch--Bringing Her Flowers Is Not Harmful To Your Health.
Graphics and Audio Tapes. 
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. 

Class 9 
Real Men Ask For Directions When Lost--Real Life Testimonials.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM Location to be determined 

Class 10 
Is It Genetically Impossible To Sit Quietly While She Parallel Parks?
Driving Simulations. 
4 weeks, Saturday's noon, 2 hours. 

Class 11 
Learning to Live--Basic Differences Between Mother and Wife.
Online Classes and role-playing 
Tuesdays at 7:00 PM, location to be determined 

Class 12 
How to be the Ideal Shopping Companion
Relaxation Exercises, Meditation and Breathing Techniques. 
Meets 4 weeks, Tuesday and Thursday for 2 hours beginning at 7:00 PM. 

Class 13 
How to Fight Cerebral Atrophy--Remembering Birthdays, Anniversaries and Other Important Dates and Calling When You're Going To Be Late. 
Cerebral Shock Therapy Sessions and Full Lobotomies Offered.
Three nights; Monday, Wednesday, Friday at 7:00 PM for 2 hours. 

Class 14 
The Stove/Oven--What It Is and How It Is Used.
Live Demonstration.
Tuesdays at 6:00 PM, location to be determined. 

Upon completion of any of the above courses, diplomas will be issued to the survivors.